please do not urinate in reservoirs

I apologize in advance for this R rated post.

PG part:

As a born and bred cross country runner who has become accustomed to the scenic trails of Brooksvale and the New Hampshire woods, discovering even remotely scenic routes in the wonderfully cement covered city of Boston has been no easy task. My favorite go-to spot is a beautiful reservoir just a quick 'yog' from my apartment, and I frequent this route quite often.

R part:

This afternoon, as I set out for my usual run, I ran into (no pun intended) a very NON-scenic sight. Something that I would clearly never see at Brooksvale, or in NH, or anywhere else halfway normal. Let me preface this by saying that there is a homeless-like man who I see on the reservoir trail often... he is unmistakeable because he has a GIANT potbelly (see image above), is quite hairy, has a long curly white ponytail, and wears nothing but the teeny-tiniest tan colored running shorts that are hiked up to wedgie proportions. These shorts cause me to think that he is naked everytime I see him, but I always breathe a heavy sigh of relief as I run by and realize that there ARE shorts there (despite the fact that they are so short they barely count as clothing). Well today, he was not wearing the shorts. He was standing totally naked- penis facing me- at the edge of the reservoir, water up to his ankles. Let me tell you, if you were ever curious as to what a disgusting, fat, pot bellied, old man looks like naked... it will give you nightmares for weeks. Apparently, he thought it was okay to urinate in the reservoir. So when I ran past (along with a few other horrified people), he was just finishing up. Thanks to the dirty fat hippie man, there is now piss in Boston's water, and I had to see the most disgusting sight ever.

Question of the night: what is one to do when they see something like that? Is there a 'naked hippie man peeing in reservoir' hotline? 911? 1-800-SUICIDE?